my body has been exhausted for the past four days, my thighs wouldn't move right and when my body doesn't feel right, neither does my head.

so i'm off balance and to do these spins you have to first slide into second position, Plié, push and get your foot to your knee, and stay there- back straight and weight centered.





I was trying so hard to cry the other night. so hard that I just started to laugh.

my teeth are also not aligned.

some boy just walked up to me and said, "beth?"
so here i am,

a new girl.
although i already owned that name a little bit to begin with.

a lot of frustration today.
nothing i can't handle.

just breathe in and out.
count to 12.

I know I ought to love you - Selima Hill

I know I ought to love you
But it’s hopeless.
Screaming is the best I can do.
I scream at you for such a long time
that even when I stop the scream goes on.
It screams between us like a frozen street
with stiff exhausted birds embedded in it.


The yellow house is mine for sure.
apartment number one.

i'll be home around the 16th.